Away Day (sort of) Diary: Braintree Town 1-3 Maidenhead United (26/11/24)

Big game this, Alan Dev's beleaguered Magpies travelling to deepest, darkest Essex – our most favourable midweek away fixture in the league this season from a distance perspective, 'just' the 178 miles there and back, which is ridiculous – for a match-up with one of his former clubs, three points and two places above us in the table, and looking to stymie another all-too-familiar dismal run (one win in 11 [all comps]; no win in nine [all comps]; four consecutive league defeats by a combined score of 13-2) with trips to York (division leaders, as I write) and Sl*ugh (for the first SL Clásico at their place since April 2001) looming large on the horizon; five years to the day since a memorable 4-3 midweek win at Dover, which was #goodjuju, and two years to the day since a lamentable 3-2 defeat at Maidstone, which wasn't

Rush hour traffic on the M25 wasn't as bad as the trip to the Kent coast in 2019, but still not great: it was approximately 2.5 hours after leaving Cox Green that Macleod (M) and I made it to King William IV – Good Beer Guide staple – to discuss favourite REM songs (prompted by Nightswimming playing on the jukebox), Nic-Cage Against The Machine (whom Macleod [M] had seen, the Saturday before last, supporting Elvana at The Hexagon; "Bognor Regis Town used to run out to Wake Up"), and attempt to calculate how many National League starting appearances there were between the six MUFC substitutes (13 is the answer, with Bradley Keetch accounting for eight of them)

A second round of Tring Brewery's eminently quaffable Liberator meant that by the time we had parked and made it onto the terrace behind the goal – with the last remaining tasty double cheeseburgers to hand – United were two-nil up ("thanks to some Maidenhead-esque defending"); "I'll be happy enough if we've missed tonight's only goals," said Macleod (M), who, like me, had no regrets

I had half-joked on social media before the game that the Braintree keeper would follow up his viral howler at Boston on Saturday with a world-class performance against us, but that prediction was far from accurate: his jitteriness was symptomatic of arguably the worst NL opposition we've faced since Oxford City last December, with the Magpies looking likely to score every time we attacked – surprising, bearing in mind the Iron had only conceded 23 goals in the 19 league games before this (missing players, perhaps – they had fewer subs than us)

No Good (Start the Dance) is one of my favourite songs, and I love The Prodigy, so I was pleased to get a photo in front of Keith Flint – R.I.P. – at half-time; the mural of him is perhaps the only improvement to the ground since I first visited the Rare Breed Meat Co. Stadium Cressing Road, travelling by train with Willie T and my sister (!) to the final league game of the 1998/99 campaign (a 2-2 draw in glorious sunshine, with Mickey 'Vialli' Creighton and Tim Cook goalscorers for the away side) – this place is ramshackle to the extent it makes York Road look like the Emirates Stadium

Three-nil – game over! – should've been the score early in the second half, but Shawn McCoulsky, one-on-one with their otherwise hapless keeper, saw his shot saved; if the former Newport County striker were a more reliable finisher, then he'd be playing his football higher up the pyramid (but he isn't so he's not)

Rally from the home side (John Akinde – "If he falls over, I fear the worst for those living close to the San Andreas Fault" – came on at half-time, and two more subs appeared before the hour mark), halving the deficit with a scrappy and poorly defended goal and prompting knowing looks and utterances from the away fans ("We've seen this movie before); previously, the atmosphere had been carefree, with a lengthy chorus of "he left cos you're shit" – referencing numerous ex-Braintree players who went on to represent the Magpies – starting with Alan Massey and ending with Nick Hamann (guffaws all around)

Effiong, Inih had collapsed at York Road whilst representing Dagenham & Redbridge in August 2023, so it was good to see him back playing again, especially as (1) he didn't score and (2) he came out with a couple of memorable one-liners, calling one of his teammates (number 7) "a pussy" right in front of the travelling contingent (you can imagine our reaction) and then asking "where ya gonna put it, bro?" just before Sam Barratt smashed a 74th-minute penalty into the top corner; the award, which had resulted in a second yellow and a red card for the wonderfully-named Marley Marshall-Miranda ("Mmm Bop"), seemed soft ... despite the appeals of me and several Maidenhead players when you watch the video – I think the away fans coerced the referee into it, having harangued him moments earlier for inexplicably failing to caution some fella for pulling back McCoulsky

Even though it rained and I initially missed the M25 turnoff on the M11 (meaning a 20-minute detour to the next junction and back, narrowly avoiding the ULEZ), the drive home was better than expected, in keeping with the evening overall; David Essex was playing on Spotify – much to Macleod (M)'s bemusement – as we left the A404 just before midnight, which, bearing in mind from where we'd journeyed, was rather apt ("Hold me close, Maidenhead United, don't let me go")

(BBC report; match highlights)

No surprise there, lost the dressing room. Correct call 👏🏼

• Not paying wages.
• Fines for going to family funerals.
• Forcing players to train on their own.
• Fines for cars breaking down.
• Cancels injured players’ gym memberships.

Beyond shocking handling of players 😡 https://t.co/69wPtn7EXM

— London Shrimper (@londonshrimper) November 27, 2024

Away Day Diary: Sutton United 1-0 Maidenhead United (16/11/24)

Since beating Southend United at Roots Hall in early October ("arguably our best/ most satisfying away day in the National League"), the Magpies' only win in nine games had come in a replay vs Taunton Town of the Southern League Premier Division South (3-0 massively flattered us), with losses including a painful FA Cup exit to Crawley Town (extending our unmatched losing record in the 1st Round Proper of that particular competition), a humbling home defeat to Forest Green Rovers (dropping us back into the NL relegation places), and Binfield – 14th in the Isthmian League South Central Division One – dumping us out of the Berks & Bucks; as such, it's safe to say that most of us travelled on Saturday, to reacquaint ourselves with familiar foes, bereft of confidence and with low expectations ... of a positive result, at least – my expectations were more optimistic regarding post-match beers with some of the Gandermonium lot

Until Tuesday and an enjoyable evening with him watching Mercury Music Prize-winning English Teacher at the Shepherd's Bush Empire, I had expected Macleod (M) to drive to Sutton, but he had places to go and people to see on Saturday night (namely Elvana at The Hexagon in Reading); so he wouldn't be going to the game, meaning I sought the company of Rainey (back from international duty in Athens) and Mo Khan for the 10:32 train to Wimbledon (via Paddington and the District Line) and then the short walk to the Wetherspoons opposite the theatre (FYI – Jack & The Beanstalk, ft. Joe Pasquale, is this year's panto)

There were a dozen or so Maidenhead fans on the 14:25 Thameslink train to West Sutton, which we caught after I'd dashed to the charity shops on Broadway (Libby the Story-Writing Fairy and Faith the Cinderella Fairy – 50p each from Scope – would equal big points from my kids, or so I thought); discussion centred on our starting lineup, with no one quite sure what formation we'd be playing (which is seldom a good sign)

The conga on Saturday – if there had been one – would've been much shorter (time-wise) than the one this much-altered ground had witnessed during #FDXV in 2015: the 113 away fans were restricted to the middle part of the side opposite the main stand, with the view from the back of the covered section largely obscured by reinforced pillars, while you were below pitch-level when stood on the AstroTurf at the front #noddy

One-nil was the final score, and we were fortunate it wasn't a heavier defeat (MUFC played 3-5-2 – with Welch-Hayes at RCB – for perhaps the first time since Dev's initial spell in charge, and it showed); our performance was better in the second half (especially after Remy came on), but not by much (their keeper didn't have a save to make all game), and the main talking point was the ejection at the break of several away fans – seemingly picked at random – on the insistence of the referee after the follicly-challenged linesman in front of us complained of intimidation ... you might think I'm making this up, but I'm not! (In hindsight, we should've walked out en masse, but in fairness, I don't think we were able to process the almost unbelievable proceedings until it was too late; Griff and Steve J. were among those loudly remonstrating with the stewards and police, which gives you an indication of things.)

Nick the Greek (real name Paul?!) was one of several home fans with whom we reacquainted ourselves in their bar – shout-outs also to Amber Aleman, Taz, Sal, Mike, Keepo, Barry, Dukey, and the rest; they're a good bunch – and he gifted me a bottle of Prosecco that he'd won on a raffle, which Les had probably polished off by the time Shay and I made it to the Alexandra in Wimbledon for more beers (Sambrook's Pumphouse, surrounded by South Africans who'd been watching the egg-chasing); so, another instalment of 'good day out tainted by 90 minutes of football'? TBH, I'm coming around to the conclusion that I've had my fill of paying exorbitant entry fees (£21, rising to £24 on the day) to watch crap football in crap away ends, officiated by crybaby w@nkers and generally treated like vermin ... and losing my charity shop purchases somewhere on the journey home certainly didn't help my mood! :(

(BBC report; match highlights)

Well done @suttonpodcast @suttonunited you've joined the ranks of non league clubs who treat away fans like scum. Such a shame as Gander Green Lane used to be such a friendly place to visit. pic.twitter.com/BwlkSiUmim

— Steve (@EducatedLeftFt) November 16, 2024

Creepy in the Cup

When invited to write something for the match-day programme about my early experiences of the FA Cup as a Maidenhead United fan, I initially struggled to think. The mid-90s was my formative time, so perhaps it wasn't surprising. Records show the Magpies went nearly six whole years, from 15th September 1992 to 5th September 1998, without winning a single FA Cup match – losses to Newbury, Havant Town (twice – the second of which saw my Grandad presented, pre-game, with a commemorative shield to mark 50 years as a supporter), Thame, and Newport AFC. That's something for me and other fans to remember if/ when we get blasé about drawing League One clubs in the 1st Round Proper, be it Oxford United away last season or Crawley at York Road.

As it is, our 4-2 defeat to two-divisions-higher Kingstonian in the 1998-99 3rd Qualifying Round is probably my most vivid, earliest, MUFC-related FA Cup memory. Michael Banton was among the goals down the Canal End, and it was 2-2 at the interval, but Michael Bolger didn't exactly cover himself in glory between our sticks. Attendance was 717 on a windy but sunny October afternoon. (26 years ago, to the day, as I write!) The crowd at our previous home league game was less than a third of that.

Since then, we've experienced the usual gamut of Cup emotions: conceding flukey winners (Salisbury at York Road in 1999 – afforded a short write-up in a national broadsheet, which blew my tiny little mind at the time); two penalty shootout wins (kudos to those who can name both opponents); lamentable first-time exits (my Dad remarked he'd never seen Roger Coombs so dejected as when we lost to Welling at home in 2002, while Bashley were struggling in the division below when they knocked us out at their place in 2008); unlikely hat-trick heroes (left-back Leon Solomon at Godalming in 2011); unlikely scorelines (7-4 defeat at Halifax in 2021); tremendous highs (James Mulley's 94th-minute equaliser and iconic celebration at Port Vale in 2015, after beating Winchester in a replay, Blackfield & Langley away, and then Woking at York Road in monsoon-like conditions) and inexcusable, era-defining lows (H*rsh@m).

No 2nd Round Proper appearance, though. A glaring omission. We've had the occasional near miss, more routinely since entering the competition in the later rounds following promotion to the National League. Leading Rotherham until the 70th minute at a rain-soaked York Road in 2019 comes to mind. However, a 3-2 home defeat to Dulwich (not Hamlet) in November 1886 remains our most 'recent' 2nd Round showing.

138 years! Hopefully not, 'and counting'.

Away Day Diary: Taunton Town 1-1 Maidenhead United (12/10/24)

This FA Cup draw (as in the balls out of the bag, not the result on Saturday) seemed like a good one – "cracking," wrote Macleod (M), "except for my wallet and liver" (the Magpies would play their fourth away game in five Saturdays, and we'd journeyed up and stayed over in Solihull for Steve H's 60th birthday party after the home defeat to Halifax) – but the timing wasn't the best; as I met with Macleod (M) for the walk to the station ahead of the 08:30 train, I felt concerned there was 'After the Lord Mayor's show' potential, further to last week's win at Southend ("arguably our best/ most satisfying away day in the National League"), plus we were both rather tired after spending Friday night with Macleods (C + P) and Willie T. in Oxford trying to find a car parking space watching the mighty Goldie Lookin Chain at The Bullingdon on their 20th-anniversary tour ("Youknowsit, clart")

Ale House for pre-11 o'clock pints (meh) and cooked breakfasts in the sunshine, as Macleod (M), TWS, Chris Chad., CB, and I were joined – in due course, and one-by-one – by Somerset Mag aka JJ McClure, Cornwall Mag, and Chris Rad.; then across the road (literally) to meet with the Batemans in the otherwise deserted Plough Inn, where Chris Chad. showcased his musical prowess by playing the riff from 'Mundian to Bach Ke' on the piano, Cornwall Mag was the Trivial Pursuit quizmaster ("Port of Spain!"), and some of us debated the topic of underrated bands (with nominations for Talk Talk, Oasis [!] and Bloc Party)

Unfavourable first impression of the Coal Orchard due to a sizeable shattered pane of glass in the front door, but it was only £2.60 a pint, while Macleod (M) appreciated the art deco style and TWS enjoyed a go on the pinball machine; I was similarly pleased to get seated out the back of the Wetherspoons, overlooking St Mary Magdalene Church, in – more-or-less – the same spot as when the wife and I had stopped off here, en route to Cornwall on holiday, ten years previous

No segregation and seemingly only two working turnstiles meant there was a lengthy queue at the Cygnet Health Care Stadium; whilst waiting impatiently, I discovered that it was – somewhat bizarrely – a Bristol City fan whom Neil had captured standing on the barriers in celebration after Reece Smith's winner at Boston

Tannoy announcement that flags should not cover the advertising hoardings prompted Macleod (M) to pull one end of the Union flag back by millimetres and immediately preceded the dominant if largely toothless Magpies opening the scoring when the Taunton goalie – who we would later chat with, briefly, in the town centre – failed to keep out Smith's 39th-minute effort; MUFC continued its ultimately-ineffectual control of proceedings until well into the second half but was unable to kill the game off, and, after the Peacocks had equalised following a long throw that neither Craig Ross nor his defenders dealt with, the hitherto passive home side and crowd belatedly came to life and justifiably sensed a come-from-behind Cup upset

One-all was the final score, though, thanks to a noteworthy double triple save from Ross, so as the travelling horde hit Wetherspoons again for more sub-two-quid pints, we were left to ponder a Tuesday night replay with an increased awareness of the U.S. sports adage about "kissing your sister"; TWS won big (ish) on an appropriately-named horse in the 17:27 at Chantilly, meaning that someone, at least, had something to celebrate

Nine-minutes-and-fifty-three-seconds-long post-match whinge by the Slough Town player-manager, who blocked me on Twitter after I quote-tweeted the video with an additional link to a Boney M song; similarly cranky was the woman in our carriage (Nb. not a quiet one) who complained about us playing – not particularly loudly, in our defence – songs from the MUFC jukebox (new entry: 'Every Little Thing She Does is Magic') because she'd "had a bad day" ... prompting someone to put on Daniel Powter! (Bad day? Nah, but by no means a great one.)

(Match highlights)

"A series of substitutions provided the Peacocks with momentum, and it wouldn't be long before Duru's fresh legs gave the Southern League Premier South side an equaliser"

Whereas we used one sub, and not until the 88th-minute. 😐 https://t.co/4cohyN0g9i

— ɢᴏ ᴍᴀᴅ ᴏʀ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴄᴀʀɪɴɢ (@gomadstopcaring) October 14, 2024

Away Day Diary: Southend United 0-2 Maidenhead United (05/10/24)

Since the Tamworth debacle and then an undeserved defeat at home to Halifax, the Magpies had rebounded impressively to take six much-needed points from league games vs Ebbsfleet and at Boston, which had lifted Berkshire's finest out of the relegation zone and set us up rather nicely ahead of a first Saturday visit to Roots Hall (especially as the Shrimpers had lost 3-1 in their two previous home matches, sandwiching a 1-1 draw – thanks to a very late equaliser – at Wealdstone); as such, there was some degree of hope and excitement as Macleod (M) and I walked to the station, where we met with the Batemans (x3) ahead of the 08:30 Lizzy line train

Options – after discussing Illan Meslier's extraordinary gaffe for Leeds at Sunderland, Boys Wonder's comeback gig at the Temple of Art and Music in Elephant & Castle, and Gent fans throwing various items at LB and others at Stamford Bridge on Thursday night – included staying on until Liverpool Street or changing at Bond Street to get the Greater Anglia train from Stratford; we went for the latter, and, after failing to identify the blue and yellow replica shirt with a predominantly green club badge worn by a match-going fan who boarded the Norwich-bound train before ours (any ideas?), arrived into Southend Victoria slightly ahead of schedule ... fruitlessly, as it happens, as the Olde Trout Tavern wasn't open

Ultimately, though, it was for the best, as coffees, Coral lager and other local delicacies (including pastel de nata) in Monte's Madeiran café went down a treat before we met with the birthday boy (Kev B) et al. in the Wetherspoons for £2.63 pints of Plum Porter; then to the pier – the longest in the world – for more beers (overpriced), photos with LB's flag and of turnstones in the sunshine, and another train ride

The bus to the ground was cancelled (not an uncommon occurrence, apparently), so Macleod (M) and I walked to Roots Hall via Greggs (helping to account, according to my Garmin watch, for over 15 miles worth of steps on the day); 24 quid for a ticket – the cost rising, without much/ any warning from either club, by £2 on match day – took the f**kin' piss and further highlighted the ridiculousness of that ground hopper fella on Twitter who recently singled out the prices at York Road for criticism

Head of Lokko put us ahead after 13 minutes, and we should've been more than one up at the interval: Smith dallied when we had an overload on a breakaway; McCoulsky nodded wide when well-positioned; there was one off the line (that looked like it might've been over – Flashscore thought it was); and Pettit was blatantly manhandled in the box as a corner came in ("We always get shit refs") – they were there for the taking, but the next goal would be crucial ...

Early pressure from Kevin Maher's boys in the second half, but Owen Cochrane (impressive overall) did well to clear off the line, and after man-of-the-match Kevin Lokko doubled the lead with another header from another Nathan Ferguson set piece, we managed to keep a mediocre home side at arm's length with relative ease; the 101 away fans (including legendary ex-Magpies Paul Dadson and Sean Marks) lustily serenaded ex-Shrimpers Ferguson (impressive overall; Wealdstone could probably do with him back), Shawn McCoulsky (who had fallen over in the second half when it seemed easier to stay on his feet and score), Sam Barratt (one of only two used subs – why doesn't Dev make more, if only to waste clock as other clubs have done and will do to us?), and Emile Acquah (a goalscorer for Barrow vs Cheltenham) as time wound down on arguably our most satisfying away win in the National League (which, TBF, is saying something)

Next Saturday's trip to Taunton in the FA Cup, the reopening of Ashley Down railway station in Bristol, and The Cannonball Run – specifically someone (make yourself known if you're reading) going as Captain Chaos for #FDXXI at Gateshead – were topics of conversation as we munched on carbs from the chippy opposite and supped decent ales, including a fruit sour from Vault City, at West Road Tap (despite some knobhead moaning – albeit not within my earshot – that it was "home fans only"); a debate about our favourite crisps over more decent beers, including another Vault City fruit sour (this one even better), in Mile and A Third after a ten-minute or so walk past several Indian restaurants, at least two more Madeiran establishments, and (Bobby) Behzadi's Barbers

Discussion in the (micro) pubs and on the non-delayed journey home, soundtracked by the MUFC jukebox playlist on Spotify, was dominated by the question of whether this really was our best/ most satisfying away day in the National League (so far); with all due respect to the legendary pre-Christmas win at Hartlepool in 2017, beating champions-elect Leyton Orient at their place in February 2019, etc., and despite this being the weakest Southend side we've played, I think it might be

(BBC report; match highlights)

Here's hoping the away fans are singing Best Years of Our Lives by Modern Romance at the end. 🙏🏻 https://t.co/5mFY3cwSFu

— ɢᴏ ᴍᴀᴅ ᴏʀ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴄᴀʀɪɴɢ (@gomadstopcaring) October 2, 2024

Away Day Diary: Tamworth 3-1 Maidenhead United (14/09/24)

This match was on my radar as soon as the fixtures came out, seeing as it would be my first train away day of the season at a relatively easy-to-get-to new ground, with several highly recommended pubs in the town centre on the manageable walk between the station and the football club and vs a newly promoted side that I thought we had a decent chance of beating (bearing in mind their plastic pitch, I was hoping for Dorking-away-last-August vibes) ... and all that before our injury-hit, patched-up team's struggles in the first eight matches meant that it would be a potentially pivotal early season six-pointer (us 20th, them 23rd with a game in hand); as such, I had booked train tickets for me and Macleod (M) in mid-July, opting for a train due to get us in earlier than our usual '11-to-midday' arrival time because it was cheaper (£26 each) ... although that didn't stop Macleod (M) complaining about commenting on the early start in the run-up to Saturday

After putting the world to rights on the walk to the station and on "a pleasantly uneventful" (albeit slightly delayed) train journey via Reading and Birmingham New Street, our pre-match pub crawl went as follows: the Wetherspoons (the Globe Inn wasn't open; fake breakfast photo), the Old Bank House (as recommended by @hopwas2010), and the understandably well-renowned Tamworth Tap (photos with @hopwas2010)

Maidenhead United losing, I can handle (see the Rochdale post for recent evidence), but Maidenhead United losing whilst looking like they couldn't care less is unforgivable and not something I ever thought we'd see from an Alan Devonshire XI (when a limited Tamworth side scored their second goal, our bench – perhaps in solidarity with those on-pitch – barely moved a muscle ... I mean, kick a water bottle over or something!)

We weren't alone in walking out shortly after their embarrassingly easy third and long before TSS' 94th-minute consolation and the final whistle – I genuinely can't remember ever leaving a game so early

Our post-match pub crawl went as follows: the Sheriff of Tamworth (the fella from Thames Valley Police – yes, we have an officer following us about THESE DAYS, which is a complete waste of taxpayer cash – said it's the worst he's seen us play), Sir Robert Peel (someone mentioned, whilst sat in the garden, this was our most embarrassing defeat since losing to Maidenhead Town in 1974, which is hyperbole – we're P2, W2 vs Maidenhead Town – but indicative of how pitiful the performance was), and the King's Ditch (a Derby County fan asked whether Tamworth has a football club – I can only assume that he was, with some degree of success, taking the piss)

Rather like the players on Saturday (or so it seemed to me), I can't be bothered, TBH – it's a struggle for me to muster the effort to write much else ...

The trains were banjaxed at Reading, so heartfelt thanks to Macleod (P) for picking us up

Halifax at York Road next Saturday; "We go again" blah blah blah

(BBC report; match highlights)

"What we have given them [the supporters] is crap" Yep.

"At the moment we are painting over cracks" Papering might work better!

"The least our fans deserve is for us to put in a shift and run around" Yep.

"If we play like this, we're not gonna get any points" Yep. https://t.co/iV3aZv7Q4g

— ɢᴏ ᴍᴀᴅ ᴏʀ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴄᴀʀɪɴɢ (@gomadstopcaring) September 15, 2024

Away Day (sort of) Diary: Rochdale 3-1 Maidenhead United (10/09/24)

Reasonable, do you think, that Maidenhead United has three – count 'em, three – Tuesday night trips to Greater Manchester (plus one to Braintree – 178 miles there and back) this season when other sides in the division have one long-distance midweek away fixture (Wealdstone's furthest, for example, is Tamworth)? Of course not, but the National League gonna National League

Our supporters' coach car, aka the MurdoMobile, picked up TWS, CB, and Chris Rad. from the station at 14:30 and made steady, if at times slow, progress northwards (not helped by heavy rain and traffic on the M5 between Oldbury and West Bromwich); the focus of my attention during much of the journey was the BBC's recent article on match-fixing in the 2013/14 Conference South ("Alexa, play Suspicious Minds")

Conference Premier Forum grandee 'Dave (Barra)' had recommended – on the relevant Match-Fixing thread – rag pudding and chips from the chippy adjacent to the away-end turnstiles, so that's where we headed after arriving more-or-less on schedule and having fortunately found a parking spot opposite the nearby Church of St Clement; once we'd wolfed down our grub ("This'll probably be the highlight of the night"), it was round to the other side of the ground for a pre-match livener in their sizeable bar (one of two), with a £3.40 pint of Manchester Pale Ale serving to highlight Stripes' comparative deficiencies in terms of drink options and prices

Horrific defending had cost us in our last away game at Aldershot, but this was another level as their impressive no. 4 was left unmarked from a corner and then afforded all the time in the world to pick his spot to open the scoring after 18 minutes, then our central defence parted like the Red Sea to allow the prolific Kairo Mitchell clean through on goal ("an insult to Sunday League defenders to describe it as Sunday League defending"; "I watched a video of a match-fixed goal earlier today and that contained better defending"); the Magpies were two-down at the break despite being the better side early on and creating some presentable chances, with Shawn McCoulsky's deflected shot forcing a smart save from their keeper's outstretched leg at 0-0 and a James Golding effort hitting the post moments before the half-time whistle

Dev, when apologetically chatting to the travelling horde at full-time, commented that he'd given his two centre-halves a thorough dressing down at the interval, but whatever he'd said hadn't worked as after 47 minutes, Mitchell was again running unimpeded onto a through ball – 3-0, and it looked like we would be on the end of proper shellacking; rather frustratingly, those wearing purple shirts then decided to wake up and, with the standout Golding to the fore in midfield and after a fine individual goal from Joseph Ajose (a promising display on his full debut), we created several more decent chances (two cleared off the line, Pettit firing just wide, etc.) ... it's just a shame we gifted them a three-goal head start! *rolls eyes*

At least the 23 away fans could hold their heads up high, making decent noise throughout (loud enough for our reigning [joint] Players' Player of the Year Sam Beckwith to hear tongue-in-cheek jibes and prompting a somewhat thin-skinned response on the social media platform formerly known as Twitter); I like going to Rochdale (the town and the ground), while RAFC might be "as nice a club as you could visit in this league," but I think it's fair to say that their vocal support/ match atmosphere isn't the best

Lighter load in the MurdoMobile on the return journey – TWS and CB went back with Josh D. – as we discussed the other National League scores (D&R's Dion Pereira, eye-catching at York Road last Saturday, grabbing a brace against a former side of his; ANG with another goal for York; etc.), how Nathan Ferguson's Guyana has been getting on during this international window (3-1 home defeat to Suriname; 2-2 draw away to Martinique), and Googling 'jobs for people who don't like people'; we made relatively good time, and after Chris Rad.'s drop-off in Twyford and a quick but cold walk from Macleod (M)'s under a starry sky, I was in the kitchen at 01:40 munching on the last slice of my birthday cake

Even though we lost, someone said we moved up in the league table and out of the relegation zone thanks to results elsewhere; however, two of the sides below us each have a game in hand, and we play at one of those – Tamworth – on Saturday, in a match that already feels pivotal ...

(BBC report; match highlights)

pic.twitter.com/9GpplGDHpC

— ɢᴏ ᴍᴀᴅ ᴏʀ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴄᴀʀɪɴɢ (@gomadstopcaring) September 11, 2024

Away Day (sort of) Diary: Aldershot Town 4-3 Maidenhead United (31/08/24)

A 26% probability of the Magpies following up Bank Holiday Monday's pleasantly surprising and historic win over Barnet with another three points at the Wreck, according to 'National League Data Analyst', which was significantly better than one's chances of being able to access Ticketmaster on Saturday morning; a large part of me wishes that tickets for Oasis' reunion tour had gone on general sale the previous day when I was still in Crete and so could've easily justified to myself not wasting time and bandwidth queuing for a queue

Latterly, Aldershot (A) has meant pre or post-match beers with my old colleague and good mate CJ, who lives close to the ground, but he was away visiting his grandmother this time (or that's what he told me!); so, as I was only just back from an enjoyable 11-night holiday, and Macleod (M) had a ruby wedding anniversary to attend in the evening, I offered to drive us and left the house with Arsenal one up vs Brighton at half-time in the early Premier League kick-off

Declan Rice's absurd second yellow dominated the airwaves, while news  of Southend United's tinpottery made us laugh during the 45-minute journey to Hampshire; I parked close to Redan Road cemetery, which proved convenient as unlike our recent visits it transpired we were to access the ground via the woods and the East Bank entrance – problematic for those Magpies with mobility issues (it would've been nice for them to have been pre-warned, of course, but Aldershot gonna Aldershot)

Early goal for the home side was a sign of things to come – a decent finish from James Henry, but some worryingly passive and disjointed defending from those wearing purple; thankfully, Reece Smith had their right-back on toast (at least in the first half), and a mazy run set up Tristan Abrahams for 1-1

Recent reports on Joshua Johnson have been positive, so it was a big blow when the young midfielder seemingly pulled a hamstring (or thigh muscle) before the break and hobbled off, heavily strapped, to be replaced by Bradley Keetch; our injury list – featuring some predictable names – continues to lengthen, with two four said to need operations so presumably out for some time (in addition to the usual suspects being perpetually "two weeks away")

Shots' defenders carelessly allowed Abrahams to cut onto his left and equalise for a second time, but that was sandwiched by two more soft goals conceded by Alan Devonshire's men, with the first – 2-1 to them, 57 minutes – being the most frustrating and not just because it came with the contest evenly poised: Kevin Lokko – who, it's fair to say, didn't have his best game – losing possession in our half

Hady Ghandour blew Macleod (M) a kiss after being called Gandalf when frivolously appealing for a throw-in or a foul in front of the 107 away fans (on the open terrace rather than in one of the stands, which was a shame), then later scored Aldershot's fourth following more ponderous defending – the second time in as many visits that we've conceded four at the Wreck; ex-Farnborough man Lokko pulled one back (we thought Abrahams had himself a hat-trick, although the centre-half seemingly got a touch to the striker's free kick), but the Magpies never seriously threatened another equaliser (not helped by Aldershot's third, fourth, and fifth substitutions, in the 93rd, 94th, and 95th-minutes, killing any flow)

Our league position (22nd) leaves much to be desired, but it's noticeable that the other three sides in the relegation places have considerably worse goal differences than us (-10, -9, and -9 vs -3); we play all of them – at Tamworth and Boston; vs Ebbsfleet – in September

Time for another loan signing? (We've already used more loan players in six matches than we did during last season.) TBH, Dev – who has now managed an incredible 800 games in sole charge of Maidenhead United – doesn't really have much choice.

(BBC report; match highlights)

I’m 94,354th in the queue to make my joke about the Oasis ticket queue.

— Tom Jamieson (@jamiesont) August 31, 2024

Scouse Mick

After the gut punch that was the devastating news our friend Michael 'Scouse Mick' Vogel had passed away following a short battle with Motor Neurone Disease, I immersed myself in various photo albums on Facebook. Per his obituary on the MUFC website, as well as football (Everton and the mighty Magpies), his family and friends, fishing and music (Pink Floyd and The Farm), a big passion of Mick's was photography – he was the club's photographer for a time; his wildlife work as featured on the likes of BBC's Springwatch. As such, I hope he would appreciate this photo tribute spanning his near-quarter century as one of the most colourful and well-liked Maidenhead United fans of this or perhaps any other era. Regardless, I'm not sure I can find the words to adequately describe his larger-than-life character, the japes and scrapes (a phrase that Murdo has used elsewhere), and the extent to which we will miss him. So, the pictures will have to do the bulk of the work!

^^^ I first spoke to Mick at the tail end of April 2001 when, at the inaugural Fancy Dresslemania, the team and supporters' coach broke down on the way to York Road, so Murdo – dressed as a Thunderbird – drove me (Mr Blobby – no jokes, please), Callum (Bernie Clifton), Willie T. (Donald Duck), and a plain-clothed Mick to Sutton. (Coincidentally, his first Magpies game had been the reverse fixture the previous November.) Almost a year to the day later, he was a fully-fledged member of the KSG, to the extent that he was out in Maidenhead with me and Willie T. (and others?) the night before Fancy Dresslemania II at Grays. An incident on Queen Street subsequently led to a noteworthy start to Mick's Saturday, much of which he would spend dressed as a gorilla!

^^^ May 2002, celebrating with the Berks & Bucks Cup back in Stripes after a penalty shoot-out win over Chesham at Adams Park (IIRC, MUFC Hall of Famer Tim Cook had missed his kick for the Generals CSG correction: Cook didn't take a penalty). The fact that Mick could wedge a cigar between the gap in his front teeth can be linked to that night out on Queen Street!

Here's the aforementioned team photo. Poor quality, but it'll have to do for now. pic.twitter.com/J1nL3Ytw1k

— ɢᴏ ᴍᴀᴅ ᴏʀ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴄᴀʀɪɴɢ (@gomadstopcaring) July 30, 2024

^^^ Murdo's report and some photos from our supporters' match vs Bishop's Stortford in November 2002 – a 7-1 win! Scouse saved a penalty despite noting on Twitter that he "told the taker to put [it] one side and I'd dive the other ... fool put it the same way I dived!"

^^^ Elvis Presley eating a burger on the toilet in the Cricketers after a 4-3 win at Bishop's Stortford in April 2003. Perhaps *the* best Fancy Dresslemania photo, which is high praise.

Apropos of nothing https://t.co/3BlQOQ9yON pic.twitter.com/jXOOPFovge

— ɢᴏ ᴍᴀᴅ ᴏʀ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴄᴀʀɪɴɢ (@gomadstopcaring) May 17, 2024

 

^^^ Murdo's report of the Wealdstone 5-a-side tournament in May 2003. Scouse dislocated a finger and spent time, accompanied by my Mum, in Northwick Park Hospital. That helped forge a long-standing bond between the two of them. Mick sent a lovely message to me after my Mum passed away during the pandemic in 2020, which meant a lot.

^^^ Fancy Dresslemania at Hornchurch in April 2004.

^^^ Outside my flat on Cotham Brow, Bristol, in November 2004. (Craig, some years later: "Was that photo taken through a fat-reducing filter or something?!"). We caught a bus from the stop down the road to Temple Meads and then a train to Weston-super-Mare. Scouse Mick and Gav Chelse entered one pub, only to come straight back out before the rest of us had even made it over the threshold because this particular place had no wallpaper and looked – and this was coming from Mick and Gav, don't forget – decidedly dodgy! I think it's a gastropub now. United lost 2-1. Lawrence Yaku scored our consolation. 336 saw it. I recall Craig O'Connor slapping Rob Saunders during the on-pitch post-match warm-down! We had a night out back in Bristol, although I don't think Mick was allowed into Reflex because he was sans ID! IIRC, he didn't have a passport at the time (nor would he entertain carrying one about if he did, and certainly not at the behest of a cheesy 80s nightclub!)

^^^ Fancy Dresslemania at Newport County in April 2005. Effectively a relegation play-off decider, which we lost 2-1. The Beefeater and Friar Tuck's post-match debrief in the clubhouse with our unpopular charlatan of a manager went as you might imagine it would!

^^^ Fancy Dresslemania at Histon in April 2006.

^^^ Stafford Rangers (A) in November 2006. Maidenhead's first appearance in the 1st Round Proper of the FA Cup since the 1971/72 season. Our last appearance in the 2nd Round Proper? A 3-2 defeat at home to Dulwich (not Hamlet) in November 1886. (Nb. Mick's older brother, John, dressed as a tiger at Grays in 2002, is on the left-hand side of this photo.)

^^^ Talking of proper rounds – check this one out! Celebratory drinks in Stripes – served by Zuzana, now living in Australia – after a 3-0 win over Mangotsfield in April 2007. Sterling, Nisbet, and Behzadi with the goals. 492 saw it. One of 17 wins in our last 23 league games of the Southern League season, including a memorable Play-Off Final victory over Team Bath at Twerton Park. This photo cropped up in conversation when I visited Mick in Wexham Park Hospital with Fuzz and Paddy – the last time I saw him in person.

^^^ Boxing Day, 2009. The Magpies have lost 3-0 at home to St Albans, and Stripes is closed? To the Anchor!

^^^ With Magpies legend Mickey Creighton after the Stan Payne Memorial Trophy game – in aid of the Harefield Hospital Scanner Appeal – at York Road in May 2010.

^^^ Dartford (A) in March 2011 – a legendary day out, despite a 3-0 defeat. Game three of four without a goal and part of a run of two league goals in eight! (But, yeah, give Drax another multi-year contract extension!)

^^^ Fancy Dresslemania in April 2011. We walked to and from a reserve team game at Binfield, raising more than £1,200 for Parkinson's UK. It was sweltering hot at times. So, it wasn't ideal to dress as Father Christmas! Mick managed a photo of Willie T., as Postman Pat, standing next to a Post Office van just before we set off from Chez Macleod – another of the great Fancy Dresslemania photos.

^^^ A 4-2 defeat at Weston-super-Mare in November 2011, ft., it would seem, mine and Mick's audition to replace Peter Kay and Paddy McGuinness as Max and Paddy.

^^^ Rock the Moor, Cookham, in May 2013. Mick was often a photographer at the event, including when The Farm played in 2023 – check out his photos on their blog. (UPDATE: They've also posted a tribute. As John mentions on Facebook, Mick would be honoured.)

^^^ A 4-1 thumping by Wealdstone in April 2015 – Drax's last game at York Road in charge of the Magpies. Someone forgot to wear sunscreen, so they ended up looking like Hellboy! Mick and I were the last two standing (just about!) in the Anchor.

^^^ Blackfield & Langley (A) in the FA Cup 3rd Qualifying Round, October 2015. Infamous! To the extent that Alan Dev mentioned it when presenting Mick with his Clubman of the Year award in 2017/18.

^^^ Port Vale in the FA Cup 1st Round Proper, November 2015. Mick – seen, top, in the pub before the game at Vale Park – infamously missed James Mulley's late equaliser ... perhaps *the* 'I was there' Maidenhead United goal of recent vintage! However, he was in situ on the Bell End when Alan Massey (!) gave us the lead on telly in the replay.

^^^ My first born, if not Willie T., admiring the framed works of one M. Vogel displayed on the wall of the King's Arms in Cookham during Easter 2016.

^^^ More fraternising with the Stones lot – at their place after a 0-0 draw in April 2016 (top), and in the Bear after our 2-0 win at York Road on New Year's Day 2017.

^^^ Enjoyable and memorable away days at the top of the Conference South – a 1-1 draw at Hungerford in February 2017 (did we ever establish why Fuzz was wearing a sailor's hat?!) and in the Pig & Fiddle, Bath, on April Fools' after our first win vs the Romans at Twerton Park (P8, L8 before this 5-1 mauling).

^^^ Arms (and crutches) aloft! Goals from Tarpey and Parkinson secured the Magpies a 2-1 win over East Thurrock at York Road – our seventh straight victory – and then news filtered through that Ebbsfleet had only drawn vs Truro. That set up an epic bank holiday weekend in Newquay ahead of our Easter Monday romp at Truro, ft. Mick's photo of me (one of my favourites), arms outstretched, and mine of him: Maidenhead scarf, Everton hat, and a bottle of Coke (yeah, right!) in hand. Classic Scouse Mick.

^^^ Ebbsfleet at York Road in the title-decider-that-ultimatey-wasn't. Pre- and post-match photos with former and current Magpies (Messrs Hale and Massey), top, and one for the ages – a veritable who's who of Maidenhead United supporters and officials.

^^^ On the pitch at Margate, Fancy Dresslemania in 2017, after Maidenhead United had won its first league title since 1962. It hadn't sunk in. I'm not sure it ever has! The best day.

^^^ Photographing Maidenhead United in the National League – our legendary come-from-behind win at Hartlepool, just before Christmas in 2017, when Mick captured arguably his best MUFC image (Marksy's mask), and vs Stockport in the Trophy at York Road in February 2018.

^^^ Fancy Dresslemania at Dagenham & Redbridge in April 2018. Mick was on photographer duty whilst dressed as a hippie! Some of his photos from the day feature towards the end of the Season Montage video.

^^^ A bottle of Dooley's in a convenience store in Alcudia, Majorca. (I recall we won 1-0 at Leyton Orient whilst I was on holiday.) Ask Murdo to explain the significance. Clue? Canvey Island (A) in the Trophy QF in 2003/04 ...

^^^ A mock (?!) incredulous Alan Dev presenting Mick with his Clubman of the Year award for 2017/18, referencing Blackfield & Langley! Off to Off the Tap to commemorate that, a 5-2 final day home win vs Bromley, and a top half finish in the National League.

^^^ April 2019, in Stripes after a 2-0 win over Chesterfield to round out another successful National League season. (Check out those gnashers!)

^^^ With Phil W. in the Three Pigeons, Halifax, ahead of an FA Cup 1st Round Proper tie in November 2021. Result? We lost, 7-4.

^^^ Celebratory drinks in the Portland Arms after beating Bromley 1-0 at York Road post-Christmas 2021 (top; bottom left) and Boreham Wood 2-0 on telly in February 2022.

^^^ November 2023, Oxford United (A) in the FA Cup 1st Round Proper. Mick at the back of the coach with 'just a Coke' in hand. Check. Mick missing the second half, a la Port Vale (A), and taking a photo of me – in the away end with scarf aloft – from the Kassam car park. Tick. Karaoke in the Portland Arms (IIRC, Mick nailed Cool for Cats by Squeeze), with him and I being the last ones to leave in the small hours. Of course! *sobs*

Shine on you crazy diamond.

Everyone at Maidenhead United are devastated to hear about the passing of long-time supporter Mick Vogel.

Mick was a regular spectator of the Magpies and a dear friend to many involved with the club.

We would like to send our condolences to Mick's family and friends. pic.twitter.com/eVjMB15mfS

— Maidenhead United (@MUFCYorkRoad) July 29, 2024