"As for Maidenhead, the conga (which was amusing) aside, quite a strange bunch really – some the oddest chants I've ever heard at a football match" ~ localboy86, Amber Planet forum, 26th April 2015

Friday 1 November 2024

Creepy in the Cup

When invited to write something for the match-day programme about my early experiences of the FA Cup as a Maidenhead United fan, I initially struggled to think. The mid-90s was my formative time, so perhaps it wasn't surprising. Records show the Magpies went nearly six whole years, from 15th September 1992 to 5th September 1998, without winning a single FA Cup match  losses to Newbury, Havant Town (twice  the second of which saw my Grandad presented, pre-game, with a commemorative shield to mark 50 years as a supporter), Thame, and Newport AFC. That's something for me and other fans to remember if/ when we get blasé about drawing League One clubs in the 1st Round Proper, be it Oxford United away last season or Crawley at York Road.

As it is, our 4-2 defeat to two-divisions-higher Kingstonian in the 1998-99 3rd Qualifying Round is probably my most vivid, earliest, MUFC-related FA Cup memory. Michael Banton was among the goals down the Canal End, and it was 2-2 at the interval, but Michael Bolger didn't exactly cover himself in glory between our sticks. Attendance was 717 on a windy but sunny October afternoon. (26 years ago, to the day, as I write!) The crowd at our previous home league game was less than a third of that.

Since then, we've experienced the usual gamut of Cup emotions: conceding flukey winners (Salisbury at York Road in 1999  afforded a short write-up in a national broadsheet, which blew my tiny little mind at the time); two penalty shootout wins (kudos to those who can name both opponents); lamentable first-time exits (my Dad remarked he'd never seen Roger Coombs so dejected as when we lost to Welling at home in 2002, while Bashley were struggling in the division below when they knocked us out at their place in 2008); unlikely hat-trick heroes (left-back Leon Solomon at Godalming in 2011); unlikely scorelines (7-4 defeat at Halifax in 2021); tremendous highs (James Mulley's 94th-minute equaliser and iconic celebration at Port Vale in 2015, after beating Winchester in a replay, Blackfield & Langley away, and then Woking at York Road in monsoon-like conditions) and inexcusable, era-defining lows (H*rsh@m).

No 2nd Round Proper appearance, though. A glaring omission. We've had the occasional near miss, more routinely since entering the competition in the later rounds following promotion to the National League. Leading Rotherham until the 70th minute at a rain-soaked York Road in 2019 comes to mind. However, a 3-2 home defeat to Dulwich (not Hamlet) in November 1886 remains our most 'recent' 2nd Round showing.

138 years! Hopefully not, 'and counting'.

Monday 14 October 2024

Away Day Diary: Taunton Town 1-1 Maidenhead United (12/10/24)

This FA Cup draw (as in the balls out of the bag, not the result on Saturday) seemed like a good one  "cracking," wrote Macleod (M), "except for my wallet and liver" (the Magpies would play their fourth away game in five Saturdays, and we'd journeyed up and stayed over in Solihull for Steve H's 60th birthday party after the home defeat to Halifax)  but the timing wasn't the best; as I met with Macleod (M) for the walk to the station ahead of the 08:30 train, I felt concerned there was 'After the Lord Mayor's show' potential, further to last week's win at Southend ("arguably our best/ most satisfying away day in the National League"), plus we were both rather tired after spending Friday night with Macleods (C + P) and Willie T. in Oxford trying to find a car parking space watching the mighty Goldie Lookin Chain at The Bullingdon on their 20th-anniversary tour ("Youknowsit, clart")

Ale House for pre-11 o'clock pints (meh) and cooked breakfasts in the sunshine, as Macleod (M), TWS, Chris Chad., CB, and I were joined – in due course, and one-by-one – by Somerset Mag aka JJ McClure, Cornwall Mag, and Chris Rad.; then across the road (literally) to meet with the Batemans in the otherwise deserted Plough Inn, where Chris Chad. showcased his musical prowess by playing the riff from 'Mundian to Bach Ke' on the piano, Cornwall Mag was the Trivial Pursuit quizmaster ("Port of Spain!"), and some of us debated the topic of underrated bands (with nominations for Talk Talk, Oasis [!] and Bloc Party)

Unfavourable first impression of the Coal Orchard due to a sizeable shattered pane of glass in the front door, but it was only £2.60 a pint, while Macleod (M) appreciated the art deco style and TWS enjoyed a go on the pinball machine; I was similarly pleased to get seated out the back of the Wetherspoons, overlooking St Mary Magdalene Church, in – more-or-less – the same spot as when the wife and I had stopped off here, en route to Cornwall on holiday, ten years previous

Nsegregation and seemingly only two working turnstiles meant there was a lengthy queue at the Cygnet Health Care Stadium; whilst waiting impatiently, I discovered that it was – somewhat bizarrely – a Bristol City fan whom Neil had captured standing on the barriers in celebration after Reece Smith's winner at Boston

Tannoy announcement that flags should not cover the advertising hoardings prompted Macleod (M) to pull one end of the Union flag back by millimetres and immediately preceded the dominant if largely toothless Magpies opening the scoring when the Taunton goalie – who we would later chat with, briefly, in the town centre – failed to keep out Smith's 39th-minute effort; MUFC continued its ultimately-ineffectual control of proceedings until well into the second half but was unable to kill the game off, and, after the Peacocks had equalised following a long throw that neither Craig Ross nor his defenders dealt with, the hitherto passive home side and crowd belatedly came to life and justifiably sensed a come-from-behind Cup upset

One-all was the final score, though, thanks to a noteworthy double triple save from Ross, so as the travelling horde hit Wetherspoons again for more sub-two-quid pints, we were left to ponder a Tuesday night replay with an increased awareness of the U.S. sports adage about "kissing your sister"; TWS won big (ish) on an appropriately-named horse in the 17:27 at Chantilly, meaning that someone, at least, had something to celebrate

Nine-minutes-and-fifty-three-seconds-long post-match whinge by the Slough Town player-manager, who blocked me on Twitter after I quote-tweeted the video with an additional link to a Boney M song; similarly cranky was the woman in our carriage (Nb. not a quiet one) who complained about us playing  not particularly loudly, in our defence  songs from the MUFC jukebox (new entry: 'Every Little Thing She Does is Magic') because she'd "had a bad day" ... prompting someone to put on Daniel Powter! (Bad day? Nah, but by no means a great one.)

(Match highlights)