Scarf My Father Wore - County's adopted anthem - is, according to Tim Marshall's excellent "Dirty Northern Bastards!" And Other Tales from the Terraces: The Story of Britain's Football Chants, as good it gets re songs at football; I was pleased to hear it live … although it can go on a bit!
The
Maidenhead equivalent, of course, is Soggy Sombrero; the original instigator of said ditty - the legendary Brian McK - entered the Maiden's Head, pre-match, just as
we were leaving
Orient
getting all of the Bell End in August pissed me off, as my York Road match day
experience is negatively affected by not being able to stand behind both goals;
imagine my reaction to turning up on Saturday and seeing that segregation pens
have been installed on the 'Maidenhead Kop' (the turd-coloured paint job does, I
think, give some indication as to the level of thought from those responsible)
Canal
End: plans for turnstiles down there - work had belatedly started last summer -
appear to be in tatters (a breezeblock wall has been demolished, replaced by a chain-link fence that extends towards York Road),
hence the aforementioned ruination of the Bell End :-(
Keeper
Ben Hinchliffe was in the thick of the action
throughout: expertly stopping a fierce drive from James Comley - after the
Hatters had taken an early, and not-undeserved, lead - then smiling ear-to-ear at
the away fans (noticeably fewer than the other ex-Football League sides that
we've hosted this season), who were literally wiping brows and puffing out
cheeks, after the 'Marlow in the black' had booked Comley for an alleged dive (stonewall penalty not given, IMO; other decent shouts also waved away)
Piss
poor performance from the official summed up still further when he clearly went
to book our Man of the Match, Ryan Upward, for over-celebrating his equaliser -
Les described my reaction to the goal as 'rolling back the years' #scenes -
only to realise that it would've been the midfielder's second yellow of the
game, and so sheepishly returned the card to his pocket
On
an increasingly wet and muddy pitch - one that certainly wasn't conducive to
easy-on-the-eye football - Maidenhead cranked up the pressure; Stockport
defended valiantly, though, while the ball just didn't seem to want to fall for
us in their box … and when it did …
Ryan
Upward - that man again - was denied by another top drawer Hinchliffe save; a
near relentless barrage of corners followed, as full-time approached, but the
final whistle sounded seconds BEFORE an effort from substitute Adrian Clifton
nestled in the onion bag
Tuesday
night replay it is then; uncertain, at the time of writing, whether I'll be
able to join Macleod (M) and his other passengers for the car journey up north
…
(Match
highlights here)
Snow
was forecast, but the game went ahead; however, I wasn't among the travelling
support - 21 diehards in total - due to babysitting duty
Team
sheet didn't fill me with much confidence: Remy Clerima out (injured?), Harry
Pritchard and Sean Marks only on the bench
0-0 at the break was a minor miracle: both Craig and Macleod (M) were far from
complimentary about our first-half display
Cue
a half-time rocket from Dev, presumably, and two quick-fire goals (from Jake
Hyde and Sam Barratt)
Kiss
of death, texting 'Wem-ber-ley! Wem-ber-ley!' to Craig and the Macleods? Yep.
Pegged
back to 2-1 by Darren Stephenson - impressive in
the first game; this one as well, by all accounts - before County equalised,
via a deflection (again; their opening goal at York Road had also been inadvertently
diverted past Carl Pentney), in the 90th-minute
Ouch!
3-2 AET, with a strong suspicion of handball re their winner; "Two-nil and you
fucked it up" :-(
Rather
like our disappointing FA Cup exit, at Coventry in November, the only silver
lining is that an eagerly anticipated league game - Macclesfield away on 24th
February - can now go ahead as originally scheduled
Tough
result to take, though, no two ways about it; almost glad that I wasn't there.
(Almost.)
(Match
highlights here)
Tottenham
vs Arsenal on BT Sport; Maidenhead could really do with another striker, but
even the Magpies would likely turn their noses up at Alexandre Lacazette, judging by his finishing - or lack of - at Wembley
Oval
ball action, i.e. Ireland vs Italy in the Six Nations on ITV? I watched less than ten minutes before bolting to the kitchen to make
cupcakes with Junior (whilst listening to BBC Radio Berkshire, obvs.)
Rather
worrying to read Dev's pre-match comments about the state of the squad, post-Stockport; learning that Alan Massey was also suspended for
two games only made things worse
Quite
a din from the travelling support - who numbered anywhere between 200 and 400,
depending on your source - even before they'd taken a first-half lead (great
strike by Colchester loanee Aaron Barnes, brilliantly captured by Scouse Snapper Mick)
Upward,
Ryan with a superb equaliser, direct from a free-kick; goals and Magpie of the Match displays on consecutive Saturdays from
the former Flackwell Heath, Beaconsfield SYCOB and Burnham midfielder, who
seems increasingly comfortable at this level
ANOTHER
fluky, deflected goal against (late winner); very frustrating
York
Road stewards would struggle to organise the proverbial piss up in a brewery, so
it was a baffling decision - by the similarly incompetent Thames Valley Police?
- not to segregate; disappointing, but certainly not surprising, to read
reports of fisticuffs between small groups of
'supporters' #familyclub
(Match
highlights here)
Gone
are the days when I'd religiously attend Maidenhead United games - week in,
week out, without question - but I genuinely can't think of any that I was gutted to miss … until this month when, it transpired, two
came along like London buses: the replay at Stockport and our - quite possibly
one and only - visit to Nethermoor Park
Unfortunate
timing for me, as this fixture - the first of three 'big' away games in the space of four weeks (the others being Macclesfield and Gateshead) - coincided with a
trip to the in-laws' to celebrate my wife's birthday
I
chatted with my neighbour - Truronian, octogenarian, and Magpies Season Ticket
holder - whilst loading the car on Friday morning; "Guiseley have lost their
last six … so they'll probably beat us!" he quipped
Strange
coincidence that Paul Cox was sacked as Lions boss in the week: the second time this season that he's been relieved of managerial duties ahead of a game with us!
Earthquake,
registering 4.4 on the Richter scale, should've been - but wasn't! - felt
by us, shortly before 3pm, in Monmouth: approximately 50 miles from the epicentre and home, it would
seem, to a British Geological Survey real-time seismogram monitoring station!
Less
said the better re our defending, as the home side opened the scoring through
ex-Wanky Wanderers striker Dayle Southwell, but the Magpies were ahead at the break, and Harry Pritchard - with his second; Jake Hyde got
the equaliser - extended the lead soon after the restart
Easy
enough win, by all accounts, and we're now slap-bang mid-table (P11 D11 L11 F46
A46); happy days
You'll
struggle to find a Magpies fan, BTW, who won't wish James Mulley all the very
best - even at Humpton - following his recent move; he'll always have a
prominent place in Maidenhead United folklore, thanks to that goal - and THAT
celebration - at Port Vale in the FA Cup #pandemonium
Evening
games at York Road are often magical: even the most mundane league encounter
can feature memorable 'I was there' moments (e.g. Louis Wells' comical flap leading directly
to Lord Jamal of Fyfield's solitary home goal - a thirty-yard wonder strike
three-yard tap-in winner - vs Staines [Att. 271] in April 2010; Rocky Baptiste's hilarious free-kick vs soon to be defunct Thurrock [Att. 186] in March 2009)
As
such, there was no way I was staying at home to watch Chelsea vs Barcelona on TV
(sentiment seemingly shared by 1,054 others)
Strong
start from the home side, as strong winds swirled around the oldest senior
football ground in the world continuously-used by the same club™; James Comley
was pulling the strings, despite Eastleigh's best efforts to kick him off the
park
Thirty-six
(or thereabouts) was Moses Emmanuel's first
half offside count but, on one of the few occasions that the flag stayed
down, the former Spitfires striker latched onto Sean Marks' flick and curled a
shot past Graham 'Arsenal Invincible' Stack; a great finish, if it wasn't miss
hit/ deflected (the flight of the Conchords ball was rather odd)
Late
arrival from Macleod (M) - owing to football practice with the Nomads - and, as soon as he'd taken his place on the Bell End, just before half-time, Eastleigh were awarded a (dodgy) penalty; big centre half Ayo Obileye duly dispatching the spot-kick, as
he had done in the corresponding fixture
Excellent
run and cross from Harold Odametey, after the break, set up Marks to restore
our lead (#9 burying the ball at the third attempt); Sauce was Man of the Match
and had the left-back - Sam Wood - on toast in the second half … so
much so that the ex-Wanky Wanderers defender was later hauled off!
I
fully expected the referee to blow for a foul on Stack, as Harry Pritchard's
corner sailed over the keeper's head and into the net, but he didn't! (Chris
'knee-high to the first defender' Ferdinand would surely disapprove)
Golden
Earring (of Radar Love fame) cropped up in conversation
on the Canal End - sparking a roll call of other Dutch bands - as the Magpies
sauntered to a richly-deserved victory; now just seven points off the play-offs!
Hard
away games coming up, though: league leaders Macclesfield on Saturday - fresh
from a remarkable 4-1 win at Tranmere - followed by fourth-placed (at time of writing) Boreham Wood on Tuesday
(Nb. currently the top two sides in both the four-game and ten-game form tables)
Macleod
(M) and I were approached at the station, whilst waiting with TWS and Shay for
the 08:52 to Reading, and are now informants for the British Transport Police;
the karmic payback for this was our train going backwards - literally - from
Birmingham New Street
Another
delayed journey on Branson's sorry excuse for a rail franchise only made
bearable by an entertaining conversation with the young lady sat opposite me (a
25-year-old peroxide blonde Care Worker from Coventry with face-piercings and more tattoos than the average 'baller); she
was going to Stoke, to visit her soldier boyfriend, and so we tasked her with
photographing a pint of Titanic Brewery ale (she'd only
managed some shop-bought bottles, as of Saturday night, although these did
include a Plum Porter)
Craig
was originally due to be coming with us - indeed, he'd actually bought the
tickets, on the train journey to Hartlepool the week before Christmas - but
would instead be attending the launch of Tracey Thorn's new Record; still, he had been kind enough to provide us with some
recommendations via the Good Beer Guide app
Circular
(kind of) walk - 3.3
miles in length and featuring six pubs, Moss Rose (obvs.), plus a stop at the
Aldi near the station - was planned, and highly
anticipated, but put under some pressure by our tardy arrival
List
of pre-match boozers: the Treacle Tap (we'd almost persuaded
the aforementioned Care Worker to ditch her beau and join us here, so good did
it sound; and it didn't disappoint), RedWillow (beer menu as extensive as the copper pipework in this stylish bar which, while perhaps a
bit too swanky for a football away day with the LADZZZ, seemed fairly typical of
Macclesfield: 'an upmarket Halifax'), and the Park Tavern (meh; more of a
restaurant than a pub)
Lovely
stroll, through South Park, to the ground; visual
highlights included a Yates' Wine Lodge sign on the side of someone's house
(coincidence Liverpool FC flags were flying from the caravan in the
garden? I think not! #stuffwevescoused) and two massive (Moldavian?) military vehicles
parked on a residential street
Ex-Football
League club in delusions of grandeur shock! We were initially snubbed at the away fans turnstiles - directed instead to the away fans ticket office - before not being allowed on the sun-baked terrace behind the goal
Square
pegs, round holes line-up - again - from the Magpies, with James Comley (rested) and Harold Odametey (personal reasons) both absent; losing Rene Steer and
then the in-form Harry Pritchard, both with injuries, before the start of the second
half, certainly didn't help matters
Food
was substandard: my Steak & Kidney pie wasn't too bad but was overpriced,
while others reckoned that the Meat & Potato ones would've been perfectly suitable
for vegetarian consumption
I
said "this will finish one-nil" - we'd defended well, particularly Jake Goodman (justified winner of our Man of the
Match poll), but lacked creativity in the final third - and so it proved;
disappointing to lose to such a late goal - Dev was FUMING - but they (just
about) deserved it … the sort of result on which title wins are forged
England behind in the Six Nations as we
entered the Macc, which was much better than
I'd expected judging by its dilapidated industrial estate surroundings (any pub
that covers its toilet walls with vintage copies of Viz gets a thumbs up from
me); the chippy opposite was doing a roaring trade, so much
so that we had second thoughts about joining the lengthy queue and instead made
our way to the Wharf (not bad, but not Cheshire
Pub of the Year -worthy either, IMO)
Last
watering hole, before our supermarket sweep, was the pump-clip-tastic Waters Green Tavern; I enjoyed (1.)
a swift pint of Banquo and (2.) correctly pointing
out to the resident barflies the Shakespeare play in which said
character - and his ghost - makes an appearance
Diane
from Donny -equivalent conspicuous by her absence, as feared, on the return train
journey; there's a noticeable difference, I think, in the clientele on Saturday
evening trains going to London through the East Midlands vs those heading
towards Reading via the West Midlands (e.g. one of the football fans who
took it upon himself to sit with us on Saturday - a bald Aston Villa supporter
with a hipster beard, who'd apparently spent the day boozing in Leamington Spa
- had something resembling a swastika tattooed on his ring finger)
(Match
highlights here)
